How to Spot a Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Agent

Seven years ago, I signed with my first literary agent. Everything was great...or so I thought. We went on submission right away...or so she said.

However, we never seemed to make any progress.

First there were excuses: It’s summer.

Then vague promises: More soon.

Then silence: …

Deep down, I knew I needed different representation, but the buzz online around her shimmered and sparkled. She was with an well-respected agency, and I had worked so hard to sign with her. I let more months pass. When I finally worked up the nerve to check in, she snapped at me and terminated our contract in a rage-filled email cc-ing the president of her company. I thought my literary career was over.

I took a couple of months off to regroup. Slowly, I started querying again and eventually signed with a new literary agent.

The difference in my new working relationship was as different as night and day. Agent #2 always replied to emails within a day and turned around manuscript feedback within a week or two. Plus, she forwarded all the replies from editors. Like, a real agent would. Finally progress. Finally real feedback.

About a year later, my first agent left the industry surrounded by accusations of fraud. Overnight, her positive online buzz transformed to vilification. When stars fall, they always seem to go out blazing.

About once a year, a new agent goes supernova. This past month was no exception. I don’t want anyone else to experience a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad agent, so here are a few red flags to watch for:

1) TERRIBLE
Be cautions of someone with little to no publishing experience setting up their own agency. New agents can be fantastic if they are at an established agency and have mentoring. However, brand-new agents CEOing on their own—YIKES!

2) HORRIBLE
Watch out for agents with high client turnover. Search an agent’s past deals. (Tip: For $25 you can get a one month subscription to Publisher’s Marketplace. Hello, data!) How many authors with deals from the past, have new deals with different agents? Sure, people move around. But if it’s A LOT, that could be a warning sign that they can’t hold on to talent. Also watch for agents who move from agency to agency to agency to agency. There’s often a reason. The trickier information to find is for agents signing many clients and dropping them just as quickly if the first book doesn’t sell in a snap. There isn’t a clear data trail for this, but in general, these tend to be “book-by-book” agents. If you are a picture book writer and an agent only wants to see one work, that could be a warning sign.

3) NO GOOD
Does the agent only or mostly sell to tiny publishing houses? Caveat: new agents might not have many deals announced. That’s okay! However, a good agent should get your work read wider than you could on your own. Their track record will tell you how and where you can expect to sell as well.

4) VERY BAD
Sometimes despite all this research, there aren’t warning signs. If you find yourself with an agent who resist transparency, ghosts you for months, or says things that seem suspicious/icky, drop them like a bad habit.

A good agent is transparent,

     responsive,

           encouraging.

Publishing is always hard. Your agent shouldn’t be making things HARDER.

Despite my rocky start, I still recommend new authors apply to literary agents. Most agents are GREAT! My time with my later agents have been some of my favorite experiences in this sometimes tricky business. So much so that I’m dedicating my next book to my current agent. (Shhh, I haven’t told her yet!)

Speaking of favorites, here are a few of my favorite recently released nature themed picture books. Just in time for Earth Day, find and share the complete list of picture books here.

Wherever you are in your career and wherever you live in the world, I hope you have the opportunity to get out into nature this spring! Happy reading and hiking trails!

-Hannah